Welcome! Writing this blog and book was probably one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. It was a heart-wrenching process that I put my heart and soul into. But more importantly, it was therapeutic. What once looked like the perfect Facebook life, shattered, now raising questions: Why? If I can save/help just one other person, it’s worth it. By sharing my insights through my journey to break free of an abusive relationship I hope to empower others through wisdom and knowledge to improve their lives.
I am sharing my story, or ‘A year in the life’ of my road to freedom and recovery. Consider it creative fiction or my disillusioned reality “according to him.” Whatever makes you comfortable. We as a society are focusing more and more on empowering women to speak out (the #MeToo movement). This blog will show that abuse in all forms cannot and should not be tolerated. And, collectively we can make a change using our greatest gift — our voices.
I’m currently in the publishing process of my book “Year of Thorns.” This blog contains excerpts from that book as well as my insights on how I got to that point in my life and what I’ve learned now as part of the healing process and growth.
Year of Thorns Summary. . .
I had the talent, I had the drive, and I had the opportunity, but I gave it all up when I met him. I was everything he needed me to be. However, after 30 years, it was clear that I had married Dr. Jekyll and was living with Mr. Hyde. I realized that divorce wasn’t an option but a necessity. My life depended on it.
His controlling and abusive behavior didn’t end when I finally found the courage to leave. In fact, it got worse. Much worse. I had no money of my own, and for the sake of the children, I was forced to stay in the marital home during the divorce process when he refused to leave. I suffered through stalking, verbal and physical violence, hidden cameras, malevolent financial intrigue, and his flamboyant and unpunished violations of court orders. I lived in a House of Horrors and was imprisoned in a dungeon built by his malice.
With the help of his greedy and unscrupulous lawyer, he coldly and masterfully orchestrated devastating attacks designed to make me look crazy and violent in attempts to get custody of the kids he hardly even knew. He lied, cheated, and stole. He staged events and recorded them as false “evidence”. He dragged me into a maelstrom of Machiavellian schemes designed to isolate me from everything I had known and loved.
To say our year of divorce was acrimonious is an understatement. Beginning with my lightbulb moment when I knew that divorce was the only key to my survival, Year of Thorns follows my personal diary in my daily struggles to break free of a person with a severe personality disorder while learning to identify 17 common emotional manipulative tactics on my road to growth and recovery.
About me . . . Now post divorce
I broke free having survived a living hell to suddenly find myself alone, miserable and cooped up during the pandemic. So once again, I put my big girl panties on and packed up my life, changed careers and moved to sunny Florida. It wasn’t easy by any means at my age to part with all that I held near and dear to my heart. I sold everything; leaving the ones I loved and moved across the country. Now I’m living the dream and haven’t regretted my decision one single day. I wake up daily looking to find what makes me happy while creating a new happy, joyous me now as a licensed Florida realtor, decorator, artist and yes, also a dock master! But I know now that I will never be truly free, no matter where I move, as long as our children link us together.
As a mother of three amazing people, I also wrote/illustrated two children’s books based on bedtime stories I created when tucking my children into bed at night. Animal Bridge will have your children begging to be tucked in at night and Sophie the Sleeping Fairy will keep them in it! Both books make the perfect bedtime combination for children ages ten and under.
Believe . . .
To accept (something) as true; feel sure of the truth.
Hold (something) as an opinion; think or suppose.
Believe in yourself, your intuition, your courage, your strength, your future.
This blog is designed to provide information and motivation to my readers. It was created with the understanding that the author is not engaged to render any type of psychological or professional advice. This blog is not intended to be a substitute for the medical advice of a licensed physician. Nor is this blog intended to give legal advice. Always check with your licensed physician and/or attorney.
The author shall not be held liable or responsible to any person or entity with respect to any loss or incidental damages caused, or alleged to have been caused, directly or indirectly, by the information contained herein. The content is the sole expression and opinion of its author. You are responsible for your own choices, actions, and results.
This is a work of creative fiction. The conversations in the book all come from the author’s creative recollections and memoirs. So, while all the stories in this book are said to be my reality and memories, names and identifying details have been changed to protect the privacy of the people involved. Not only that, in no way do they depict any true person or character which may be purely coincidental.
Cover Photograph: by Jade Winne